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I Thought Sex Was Fun... (1 Viewer)

_muse_

Come on join the joyride
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django_ said:
hehe yeh if i could have my first time all over again id love to cuz it was so nice hee hee :D
damn u! mine was crap! damn pain...
 

_boredofstudy_

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lol u looser, u were oviously packn shit 2 put it on.. if u really wanted 2 have sex u would of known how 2 have it.. n for d girl IF SHE SES SHE HAS SEX ALOT HOW CUM IT HURT HER SAD BITCH...n beisde she tells u she has sex alot?? pppft she coulda at leasts put it on for ya.
 

Comrade nathan

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How was he even able to revive this thread? The latest threads are from a month.
 

jumb

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Comrade nathan said:
How was he even able to revive this thread? The latest threads are from a month.
you can change the options down the bottom of the screen so you can see as far back as you like.
 

INXS

King For A Day
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Put this thread back where it came from.
 

Serius

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Komaticom said:
Are you sure you rammed the right hole? Because there's two, and they're pretty close together...
hence the need for a visual comfirmation when proceding on a vector for docking
 
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You know, if between both parties involved in the act, you still can't sort out the right orifice, maybe you should just play chess or something.

I mean sure, I guess if you're not too switched on *maybe* you have a chance of getting a bit mixed up, bt it's not as if she wouldn't notice and set you straight, so to speak... (You'd think)?
 

pretty pink

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taxman said:
Thanks to the almighty New Year's Eve thang, I kinda sorta had my first time...only I found how fucking awful sex can really be.

The girl I was with was someone I completely trusted and care about...we've been friends for a while, and it got to the point where the sexual tension was like....stabbing, with the blood and the string and the mehay!

Anyway, the series of unfortunate events starting pretty damn fine. I'd gone down on her and had her rolling, which I was like, so stoked about...but after she came we got to the sex bit...me with an incredibly sore jaw.

Condom #1: This condom I'd had for a while (I'm an optimist) and I was sittin there wrestling with the fuckin thing, trying to get it on and it was being a total bitch and decided that "Hey dude...I'm not gonna fit. You know how much it sucks to be a condom? Eat shit dickhead." So the condom was like, not going anywhere...I even tried putting it on the wrong way.....hey, it was worth a try. So I fucked that one off, and the girl I was with had another one.

Condom #2: Hey! Success. It was on, I was ready, she was ready. It now comes to insertion....and this is where it totally fell to bits. I...didn't fit. I was a pushin and she was a in pain, so I stopped. Then tried again slowly and she almost screamed. So she jumped on top with a pillow wrapped around her face and tried again...no fit.

So we stopped, she tried gettin me off, but the taxman's winkie faded into nothing...a bare memory of he once was. So we layed there and fell asleep....while she tried boosting my ego by telling me she has sex a lot and she's surprised I didn't fit. Well, that part worked...but as far as sex goes, it sucks.

Doom to sex! Doom to it all night long, down by the fire...with boobs....and...and....hey...anybody around here want sex?
How can u doom it if ur first "sort of time" was a bad experience....at least actually do it before u can doom it...
 

blackbunny

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taxman said:
Thanks to the almighty New Year's Eve thang, I kinda sorta had my first time...only I found how fucking awful sex can really be.

The girl I was with was someone I completely trusted and care about...we've been friends for a while, and it got to the point where the sexual tension was like....stabbing, with the blood and the string and the mehay!

Anyway, the series of unfortunate events starting pretty damn fine. I'd gone down on her and had her rolling, which I was like, so stoked about...but after she came we got to the sex bit...me with an incredibly sore jaw.

Condom #1: This condom I'd had for a while (I'm an optimist) and I was sittin there wrestling with the fuckin thing, trying to get it on and it was being a total bitch and decided that "Hey dude...I'm not gonna fit. You know how much it sucks to be a condom? Eat shit dickhead." So the condom was like, not going anywhere...I even tried putting it on the wrong way.....hey, it was worth a try. So I fucked that one off, and the girl I was with had another one.

Condom #2: Hey! Success. It was on, I was ready, she was ready. It now comes to insertion....and this is where it totally fell to bits. I...didn't fit. I was a pushin and she was a in pain, so I stopped. Then tried again slowly and she almost screamed. So she jumped on top with a pillow wrapped around her face and tried again...no fit.

So we stopped, she tried gettin me off, but the taxman's winkie faded into nothing...a bare memory of he once was. So we layed there and fell asleep....while she tried boosting my ego by telling me she has sex a lot and she's surprised I didn't fit. Well, that part worked...but as far as sex goes, it sucks.

Doom to sex! Doom to it all night long, down by the fire...with boobs....and...and....hey...anybody around here want sex?
she is a fucking lying virgin and you are a fucking salami
 

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