Fear of relationships (1 Viewer)

AsyLum

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On a more serious note, i dont have a fear of relationships, i still love what it does, but rather i think im more apprehensive, and incredibly careful with the next one. Thus i dont really expect to be in one for a while :)
 

Lexicographer

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I don't expect to be in one for a lifetime, but if circumstance proves me wrong...
 
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veanz

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... said:
calculating risk is good..cos you don't want to upset her/him
but then it screws with your mind and then where are you? reading too much or too little into signs..
 

[Shadow]

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i think what she/he meant is that don't take unnecessary risks. Like for example, don't tell a girl you like her when you know it could be only a sudden thing, or the fact that you don't know the girl very well.

i'm in this situation at the moment, but as far as i go, i just want things to stay positive, and unless she shows real signs, and i mean really obivious signs that theres hope, i don't think i'll take any risk

but thats me playing really safe,ultra-safe i might add
 

Lexicographer

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That's me, round the clock. Consequently I take no risks because I know my own reality too well. Like the girl in mind at the moment doesn't know me very well, and I don't know her beyond what little contact we have, but from that I know that to do anything now would be self defeating...

I want to tell her but it will ruin the small things I have. :(
 

FadeToBlack

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mate, if you look half as good as you do in your avatar, i think you'll be juuuust fine.
 
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MoNNiE

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LoUiE SmOoiE said:
Theres something wrong with me, ive had the most decent sweetest guys like me but i turn them all down....i have a fear of relationships, i feel that i dont want a boyfriend coz i dnt want 2 hurt them by breaking up with them...i be really nice and friendly to these guys and they get the impression that i like em back and think that i lead them on when i dnt mean to..its just i make them feel comfortable and open around me, but they take it the wrong way and wen i tell them that i dnt want a relationship they get hurt...but its like im doing this 4 them not myself, i need advice on how to fix this problem of mine

who else has fear of relationships and if so do you know why?


self confidence would be a good place to start..
i understand people do relationsihp calculations - but to meh, the best way would be to jump into it.. thought i guess that sounds rather insensitive, but by that way, remember you'll learn from the mistakes you make..you'll grow wiser towards relationships --
 

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SipSip said:
rational thinking doesn't work, if both thought that they think rationally, they shouldn't spend too much money on going out...sooner or later, things will get boring and the "flare" of the relationship will deteriorate into just a concious problem, fearing that you might hurt the others feeling and thus force yourself to be trapped into this loveless relationship. If rational thought plays up, it'll mean that you just don't want to be trapped in a loveless thing in the future.
i fully agree... a rational mind does not allow the existence of a relationship.
 

Lundy

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Lexicographer said:
I don't expect to be in one for a lifetime, but if circumstance proves me wrong...
Call me. I have a thing for guys who look like admiral ackbar.
 

~Dreamer

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Frigid said:
i fully agree... a rational mind does not allow the existence of a relationship.
i think that in order for the relationship to work, one party should have a rational mind, the other...a crazy mind.
those type of relationships balance out. if theyre both rational, or both irrational, you'll get a couple who ...well, basically are the same and just downright boring.
 

LoUiE SmOoiE

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MoNNiE said:
self confidence would be a good place to start..
i understand people do relationsihp calculations - but to meh, the best way would be to jump into it.. thought i guess that sounds rather insensitive, but by that way, remember you'll learn from the mistakes you make..you'll grow wiser towards relationships --
yeh dats true...
 

LoUiE SmOoiE

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~Dreamer said:
i think that in order for the relationship to work, one party should have a rational mind, the other...a crazy mind.
those type of relationships balance out. if theyre both rational, or both irrational, you'll get a couple who ...well, basically are the same and just downright boring.
wats a rational mind? is that like a calm, relaxed and sane person/mind?...coz id be more of a crazy person then
 

thejosiekiller

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what if ur bipolar

im technicaly not bipolar, but have a crazy personality mixed in with lots of calculating/rationale thinking
 

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