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why do hot girls go for the jerkS? (1 Viewer)

wind

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This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girl’s every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.

This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they’re at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don’t end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.

This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn’t worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you’d ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didn’t have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing “serious” between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: “oh, but we’re just friends!” And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you’re nice like that.

The nice guys don’t often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys don’t seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can’t. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as “oh, he’s too nice to date” or “he would be a good boyfriend but he’s not for me” or “he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn’t possibly ask him out!” or the most frustrating of all: “no, it would ruin our friendship.” Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can’t figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I’m going to sleep with this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn’t last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.

So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you’re sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming.


[This rant was written for the Wharton Undergraduate Journal]
[Fu-zu Jen, SEAS/WH, 2003]



And don't say I've never asked her about our future. Her reply was that we are never to be, so this "essay" is a pretty close outline of what I've been through, as sad as things may be. At least I'm not alone lol
 

wind

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Yes, I know that.

But copying and pasting is a whole lot faster than me typing out that lot.
 

wrong_turn

the chosen one
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wind said:
This is a tribute to the nice guys. The nice guys that finish last, that never become more than friends, that endure hours of whining and bitching about what assholes guys are, while disproving the very point. This is dedicated to those guys who always provide a shoulder to lean on but restrain themselves to tentative hugs, those guys who hold open doors and give reassuring pats on the back and sit patiently outside the changing room at department stores. This is in honor of the guys that obligingly reiterate how cute/beautiful/smart/funny/sexy their female friends are at the appropriate moment, because they know most girls need that litany of support. This is in honor of the guys with open minds, with laid-back attitudes, with honest concern. This is in honor of the guys who respect a girl’s every facet, from her privacy to her theology to her clothing style.

This is for the guys who escort their drunk, bewildered female friends back from parties and never take advantage once they’re at her door, for the guys who accompany girls to bars as buffers against the rest of the creepy male population, for the guys who know a girl is fishing for compliments but give them out anyway, for the guys who always play by the rules in a game where the rules favor cheaters, for the guys who are accredited as boyfriend material but somehow don’t end up being boyfriends, for all the nice guys who are overlooked, underestimated, and unappreciated, for all the nice guys who are manipulated, misled, and unjustly abandoned, this is for you.

This is for that time she left 40 urgent messages on your cell phone, and when you called her back, she spent three hours painstakingly dissecting two sentences her boyfriend said to her over dinner. And even though you thought her boyfriend was a chump and a jerk, you assured her that it was all ok and she shouldn’t worry about it. This is for that time she interrupted the best killing spree you’d ever orchestrated in GTA3 to rant about a rumor that romantically linked her and the guy she thinks is the most repulsive person in the world. And even though you thought it was immature and you had nothing against the guy, you paused the game for two hours and helped her concoct a counter-rumor to spread around the floor. This is also for that time she didn’t have a date, so after numerous vows that there was nothing “serious” between the two of you, she dragged you to a party where you knew nobody, the beer was awful, and she flirted shamelessly with you, justifying each fit of reckless teasing by announcing to everyone: “oh, but we’re just friends!” And even though you were invited purely as a symbolic warm body for her ego, you went anyways. Because you’re nice like that.

The nice guys don’t often get credit where credit is due. And perhaps more disturbing, the nice guys don’t seem to get laid as often as they should. And I wish I could logically explain this trend, but I can’t. From what I have observed on campus and what I have learned from talking to friends at other schools and in the workplace, the only conclusion I can form is that many girls are just illogical, manipulative bitches. Many of them claim they just want to date a nice guy, but when presented with such a specimen, they say irrational, confusing things such as “oh, he’s too nice to date” or “he would be a good boyfriend but he’s not for me” or “he already puts up with so much from me, I couldn’t possibly ask him out!” or the most frustrating of all: “no, it would ruin our friendship.” Yet, they continue to lament the lack of datable men in the world, and they expect their too-nice-to-date male friends to sympathize and apologize for the men that are jerks. Sorry, guys, girls like that are beyond my ability to fathom. I can’t figure out why the connection breaks down between what they say (I want a nice guy!) and what they do (I’m going to sleep with this complete ass now!). But one thing I can do, is say that the nice-guy-finishes-last phenomenon doesn’t last forever. There are definitely many girls who grow out of that train of thought and realize they should be dating the nice guys, not taking them for granted. The tricky part is finding those girls, and even trickier, finding the ones that are single.

So, until those girls are found, I propose a toast to all the nice guys. You know who you are, and I know you’re sick of hearing yourself described as ubiquitously nice. But the truth of the matter is, the world needs your patience in the department store, your holding open of doors, your party escorting services, your propensity to be a sucker for a pretty smile. For all the crazy, inane, absurd things you tolerate, for all the situations where you are the faceless, nameless hero, my accolades, my acknowledgement, and my gratitude go out to you. You do have credibility in this society, and your well deserved vindication is coming.


[This rant was written for the Wharton Undergraduate Journal]
[Fu-zu Jen, SEAS/WH, 2003]



And don't say I've never asked her about our future. Her reply was that we are never to be, so this "essay" is a pretty close outline of what I've been through, as sad as things may be. At least I'm not alone lol
we're seriously a humble lot in L&P.
 
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david88 said:
Every time I see a hot chick with her man .The man is usually a dickhead. I talk to my friends and they say his a jerk. It seems that everyone knows his a jerk except for the girl.


they are confident
they are closer to the image of 'a provider'
they can make them cum
 
S

Shuter

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pinkblinkbarbie said:
i dont agree with the 'ladder theory' at all. its a bunch of bullshit. there is no way in the world that people can sum up how relationships work or why people fall for each other and which sort of people fall for each other. it can all be proven wrong by different people so there is no point even considering it.

hot girls DO not go for jerks.....ok well um im told im hot, and my boyfriend isnt a jerk, and no one thinks so. my best friend is very hot, her boyfriend is amazing. i know a lot of hot girls with really nice boyfriends, and hot girls with boyfriends who I think are jerks...but thats only my opinion, and even if other people do agree with, its not our decision on who our friends date, and who other girls date. and everyone has different ideas on what is a hot female and what is isnt. a guy may find a girl wieghing 115kg with rolls everywhere attractive. so this once again is just sterotyping by fucked up individuals who are so sad and pathtic they find the need to stereotype people in hope of finding an answer for their secret crushes etc.

i bet the guy who wrote this thread is in love with a hot chick and he thinks her boyfriend is a jerk. get over it.
No the definition of hot girls does change very much, it's the definition of 'jerk' that changes between men and women. Men apply it correctly, women only apply it to the really obvious ones and miss out a large percentage that should also be branded jerks.* [comment]* - Generalisation[/comment]
 

pinkblinkbarbie

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Shuter said:
No the definition of hot girls does change very much, it's the definition of 'jerk' that changes between men and women. Men apply it correctly, women only apply it to the really obvious ones and miss out a large percentage that should also be branded jerks.* [comment]* - Generalisation[/comment]
not true. guys are more liekly to call a guy a jerk just because he is jealous of him or his girlfriend or what he haves. everyone does it, girls do it to. but men do it more with relationships. all people have a good quality which sometimes can only be seen by few, which is perhaps that "jerk's" girlfriend. which is why she cant see he is a "jerk". so whatever....who cares? i said it before, we cant have a say in who our friends date so get over no matter whether youre jealous, the ex, or trying to be nice but secretly love her. its her choice who she dates, and she will only learn from experience who the good and bad people are, you cant protect friends forever
 

"CLEVER NAME"

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ladder theory- written by virgins, for virgins.

id like to see a survey of the amount of people with girlfriends vs single people who believe in that shit. its like trying to exlplain the meaning of life using only maths.
 

wrong_turn

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maths explains all..hahaha

pinkblikbarbie, some of your info is wrong. though some of us may be envious or jealous of a guy beating us to the race for the girl we want, we may not neccesarily think that they are a jerk. some of us might even be happy for them, if they are happy that they are with that person.

in other words, some of us are not self-less, its like being branded home-brand rather than some over-priced and over-rated product.
 

Collin

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Girls usually go for guys like me, because I'm an outlaw biker.
 

Not-That-Bright

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Trust me, when guys call someone a jerk... it's not always because they're "jealous", it's because they ARE jerks.
Yes people should be allowed to choose who to date and such... but i think it's fair to on a forum tell girls that often they go for jerks, i'm not sure if girls can't notice it tho... when a guy keeps making stupid jokes some of which are insulting you or your friends they're a jerk.
 

wrong_turn

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Not-That-Bright said:
Trust me, when guys call someone a jerk... it's not always because they're "jealous", it's because they ARE jerks.
Yes people should be allowed to choose who to date and such... but i think it's fair to on a forum tell girls that often they go for jerks, i'm not sure if girls can't notice it tho... when a guy keeps making stupid jokes some of which are insulting you or your friends they're a jerk.
i second that opinion
 
S

Shuter

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lesmiester_dj said:
pinkblikbarbie, some of your info is wrong. though some of us may be envious or jealous of a guy beating us to the race for the girl we want, we may not neccesarily think that they are a jerk. some of us might even be happy for them, if they are happy that they are with that person.

in other words, some of us are not self-less, its like being branded home-brand rather than some over-priced and over-rated product.
If I guy is calling another guy a jerk just because he's jealous, he KNOWS he's doing it out of jealously, it's not subconcious. Any guy who will flat out lie and try to influence the opinions of girls is also a jerk. However pinkbaribie, you should be happy that the majority does NOT do this, it is only a small minority who will lie cheat deceive all to get the woman. THe others just label him a jerk because he really is one.
 
A

Alok

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nah i rkn nice guys come first.. its just they gotta wait.. and wait.. and wait.. for the girl to realise that the nice guy is who she really wants.. so yeh :p be patient all u nice guys out there.. it really pays off...
 

hbk_ace

your all F**k Liars
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hahah thats finishing first?? after the girls been played with by everyone other loser.

girls go for loser/jerks becos they like the attitude and dont realise it when they like the person

guys go for bitches/sluts cos their hot/wear revealing cloth and wanna root

hey generalisation but just a simple statement, dont take it as truth, but just a suggested opinion on the world

:) on the bright side, if u knwo u are a nice guy, just hope to meet a nice girl that appreciate u whom has the self esteem to have stayed away from jerks..... vice versa for girls
 

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