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Need some female perspective on my situation (1 Viewer)

A High Way Man

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Pace_T said:
you're wrong you stupid girls, its that fat stuttering four-eyes in your class whos too shy to talk to anyone!
cuz they are female equivalents of dat ^
 

iversion

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she took 3 days to reply..
means she was thinking of how to reject u whilst not hurting u/ruining friendship
no way its gonna get better btwn u two as dictated by ladder theory
move on
 

Serius

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cut her off abruptly. If you like her its not a real friendship anyway, its built on a lie. She wont ever give you what you want so you will just be hurting and frustrating yourself and also hurting her when she feels you expect emotions from her she just doesn't have.

The attracted thing usually comes up at some stage by one of the two [usually the guy] but girls can just deal with it a whole lot easier. If you honestly care about your friendship, then try and focus your attention on someone else, at least until you feeling for her fade and you can proceed with a normal friendship.

Kudos on dealing with it maturely and telling her how you feel, but a better way would have been to sit down and explain your feelings and actually talk it out and work out a happy situation.
 

Shoubadoo

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You mentioned your love-interest didn't state whether she has any sort of romantic feelings towards you, and some said it's because she doesn't.
That is most likely the reason, however she could also have feelings for you and is afraid that if you date, and it doesn't work out, she'd lose you completely, as she said herslef. If she felt for you like you feel for her, though, she'd most likely would've agreed to dating you.
Contrary to what I just wrote, there's no point speculating about it if she's said no.
I'd take Serius's advice here:


Serius said:
cut her off abruptly. If you like her its not a real friendship anyway, its built on a lie. She wont ever give you what you want so you will just be hurting and frustrating yourself and also hurting her when she feels you expect emotions from her she just doesn't have.

The attracted thing usually comes up at some stage by one of the two [usually the guy] but girls can just deal with it a whole lot easier. If you honestly care about your friendship, then try and focus your attention on someone else, at least until you feeling for her fade and you can proceed with a normal friendship.

Kudos on dealing with it maturely and telling her how you feel, but a better way would have been to sit down and explain your feelings and actually talk it out and work out a happy situation.
 

sexxonheels

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RPG said:
As the title suggests I need a female perspective on the situation I am in.

I really like this girl and she is a close friend. We have a fun time together and have some similar interests. I have already asked her out and she thought about it for a couple of days and she said that she doesnt want to ruin our current friendship. I understand her concern however I really do care for her.

I repect her and do not want to rush things even if do get into a relationship with her. Its just that when I am around her time seems to really fly by and some of the feelings are hard to describe in words.

Now I do want to repect her decision however I do want to be in a realationship with her eventually but I dont know how to go about showing her that I am serious without disrepecting her decision. I know it might take a few months but I am will to put the time in.

Now my question to the ladies of the board is what it is the best way to approach this situation. Do I leave it for a few months and continue our current friendship or should I just respect her decision and not bring it up again?
i had a similar situation with an x. dating your friends ends ugly and you neva see them afterwards. i think when she means she doesn't want to hurt the friendship, its her nice way of lettin you down. don't go there again
 

Roguedeth

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friend zone is like a blackhole once you're in friend zone you are nothing else than a friend.
 

sam04u

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Roguedeth said:
friend zone is like a blackhole once you're in friend zone you are nothing else than a friend.
Sort of...

Why would most people think it strange if I for example expressed my love for a lesser animal or an inanimate object? Simply because 1) We are not suited for each other. 2) The object of my affection can never express similar feelings towards me. It can't have such feelings.

To see whether you're compatible you need to figure whether or not it's mutual in that they do or can feel the same way about you as you do about them. If you don't know the person well enough to know that, you probably shouldn't be seeking a more meaningful relationship anyways.

If the answer is no, then just back away completely. If the answer is yes, make it happen.

Good Luck.
 

evche

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Exact same situation, except swap the sexes and add 3 years. still nada.

im sorry i couldnt be of more help!
 

Pace_T

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evche said:
Exact same situation, except swap the sexes and add 3 years. still nada.

im sorry i couldnt be of more help!
guys dont have a "friends zone". if they reject their female friend its cause shes not good looking enough, not because he wants to protect a friendship.
 
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she doesnt like you mate (more than a friend). the friends thing is prob just cause shes nice and doesnt want to hurt your feelings; but the fact she said no clearly shows shes not into you the way youre into her, no matter what you try to convince yourself

the sad thing is your 'friendship' will never be the same now anyway. you owe it to yourself to move on from a girl that clearly doesnt want you (no offence, but she said no. and i can garauntee in that couple of days she wasnt stewing about the decision she would have known stragiht away wht her answe was going to be..just prob thought it would make it easier on you rathre than a straight rejection, happens to everyone)

but yeh mate..shes nto into you..you owe it to yourself to move on so stop trying to find ways to word it to make it seem like you might have a chance; because you don't, she said no and the friends line is the oldest line in the book mate. good luck
 

evche

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Pace_T said:
guys dont have a "friends zone". if they reject their female friend its cause shes not good looking enough, not because he wants to protect a friendship.
That asshat.
 

*Gangzta.Gal**

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darkwolfzx said:
Go find someone else. Keep feeding her attention and she will take you for granted

i agree with that guy..im sure many girls (including myself) would love to have some1 like you ay just go out and find some1 else maybe when she sees you with another girl, she will see that she could lose you..this could possibly help her to realise her feelings for you which hopefully she has.. hope it all goes well dude!!
 

pezdog

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Same thing happened to me.....use it to your advantage, keep her as a good mate and someone to talk to from a different perspective. I used to like this girl heaps....fucked it up and got stuck in the friend zone, was burning at one stage lol but i got over it and stayed mates with her, i would probably call her my best mate now...

One of my other mates who has about 3 fuckbuddies is jealous of me because hes starting to realise how good female mates can be...all he can get is a root, he cant talk to girls at all lol
 

superbludger

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"I just want to be friends" is a euphemism for "I don't really like you like that"
If I was attracted to someone I would go out with them despite the risk of ruining the friendship.
 
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You need to make her jealous. Thrash some hot chick and make sure she finds out about it. That will put into perspective that she had you and then she lost you, and that drives girls crazy.
 

Bainesy

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i-love-maynard said:
You need to make her jealous. Thrash some hot chick and make sure she finds out about it. That will put into perspective that she had you and then she lost you, and that drives girls crazy.
Wisdom, pure wisdom.

But it is best to do it with a close relation of the girl, preferably her sister or close friend. this way they can tell the girl how amazing your are and make them even more jealous
 

zoeanne

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aww dude.. i totally know how you feel atm..
i was in a vary similar situation, apart im female.. he was i guess me best mate..
he said he liked me to, but he didnt wont to ruin our friendship if anything went wrong... its fucked i know.. but really theres nothin you can really do...
its hard but you will have to try and move on... sorry to say but its the only thing you can do others wise you can push it more and fuck it, and wont even have that friendship..
sorry..
xx
 

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