courtnez
Now, what I want is Facts
bustinjustin - I loved it! Erudite, amusing and well-constructed - I enjoyed the first reading of "Artisanal", only to have it enhanced by your informative Reflection Statement upon my second reading. Well done!
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oh i am insanely jelous! wish i thought of that idea, so so so so so goodbustinjustin said:Rightio here's my stuff
Ahhhh I didn't see this until searching my name just now (as you do..~Smurfette~ said:Jayphen – Your imagery was beautiful in some parts of your story and really moving – especially the textual integrity you used in the mark made on the tree. Your intense detail made me feel very much a part of your protagonist’s experiences. I liked how you manipulated Greek mythology (I used hints of that in my story as well!) and you explained your relevance to that in your reflection statement pretty well. Your intent to explore schizophrenia was achieved well through the delusions and symbolism you used and I enjoyed the ending. One main criticism: I saw some space for development in plot without letting it lag. I felt perhaps you could have clarified the contrasting perspectives because it seemed a little ambiguous at times. Overall however, a good read!
