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  • TURNS OUT MY COLLEGE STARTS IN 1 WEEK INSTEAD!!!!
    I LOVE coincidences!!!!
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    That was partly a lie, since I found it as something I *could* value and turn it into a goal. Even now it could still become something I value.
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    Anything can become a person’s calling in life so long as they are under the right conditions internally.
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    These conditions can be set up intentionally, but after playing around with this and turned it into a tendency, I have now become a maniac who’s value in thinks get turned off immediately and I chase the initial feeling one can get from the ‘first encounter’ of that calling.
    I become ‘The Chosen One’ all the time, but have yet to fulfil any purpose.

    Time to slow down.
    I’ll just say it now, I’ve been depressed for the past 4 years.
    Not from sadness, but from numbness.
    I’m being so open about it, even with friends reading this, since it is FINALLY no longer a concern.
    As for whether or not I’ll tell my family, well, I don’t care about bringing up past events anymore than I need to.
    I’ll just act more energetic, and they should get the idea.
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    I LOVE EVERYONE!!! AHHH~
    This is so weird, I didn’t think I was like this!
    Directrix
    Directrix
    Why are we so mad, look at his goals wanting to become a "trillion air".

    But then he could be a genius because selling air could be profitable in polluted countries.
    B
    B1andB2
    poke the bear
    HOLY MOTHER OF GOD!!! I’M ALIVE! I’M ACTUALLY ALIVE!!!
    I’m going to cry, I’M ACTUALLY GOING TO CRY!!!
    I’M ‘ME’!! MEEEEEE!!!!!!
    It took SOOOOO long, BUT I’M BEI MY HONEST AND PURE AND AUTHENTIC AND YOUNG AGAIN!!
    I’M ACTUALLY CRYING WHAT THE HELLLLL
    AAAAAAHHHHHH!!!
    I LOVE YOU ME!! I’LL NEVER LOOSE MYSELF AGAIN, I PROMISE!!!
    4 long years… 🥺😖
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    I’m so glad it happened just before college starts, now I’m ready for anything, whether it be taking over the world, or falling in love!! 😫😣😖😭 MY HEART IS EXPLODING!!!!
    Philosophy and Psychology are dumb to me now.
    Everything I learn, results in its self destruction.
    It took me 3 months of studying Buddhism to question why it’s so hard to do something so simple as a kid while as an adult/teenager. And the answer is simple, OVERTHINKING.
    ok, this is the last I’ll talk about any of my ideas like THIS, since I genuinely don’t like it.
    Directrix
    Directrix
    I like the idea of doing carefully dangerous acts to get you more exposed to risk-taking or to realise that there is no need to panic or get stressed in a certain situation. Chuck yourself in the deep-end but also have the ability to bail out.
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    A better way of putting the “self destruction tactic” into words, is, “burning off your beliefs, conclusions, memories, identities, and philosophies.”
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    Lol, I think I finally understand perhaps why @Directrix was semi-cyber bulking me. If I’m wrong then I’m wrong, but if I’m right, then thanks for “throwing me in the deep end”.
    hello immortal, how is hsc coming along for you
    • Haha
    Reactions: 8=D
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    Alright. However, I don’t study for them, and haven’t for the past 2-3 months.
    The reason:
    1 - filler
    2 - not for me
    3 - takes up time from studying subjects and skills I’ll personally require within the game industry
    4 - high school doesn’t teach the necessary subject material for any work-force.
    5 - I don’t care
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    My parents still care about how I neglected high school however… they just won’t let go!
    This story will make you live your 'Greatest' life:

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    Thankfully, since I’ve snapped back to reality, I started weightlifting, drawing, and turned life into a game of different ‘missions’ to accomplish.
    I’m going in for the grind, but also for the reward and the satisfaction of doing things through MY OWN EYES.
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    If you don’t understand what I mean, I hope you start your journey of self destruction, study psychology, and then lose the purpose of it, so you come out wise, but also successful.
    (Wisdom can freeze A LOT of people, I learnt that first hand - trust me, even being aware of this fact doesn’t DO anything)
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    My emotions are almost as sensitive as they were 2 years ago, meaning that I’m almost half way to the ‘high’ that I was at 5 years ago.
    My sleep schedule: 8 PM-3 AM (7 hours of sleep)
    Study schedule: 4 AM-7 PM (15 hours of study)
    Fun Fact (not really fun): I work as long as Elon Musk [Unfortunately not as hard - but I still get an hour more sleep than him at least]
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    Goal: Work harder than Elon Musk consistently. And don't ruin sleep schedule till immortality has been achieved, so I don't have to sleep.
    Ultimate Goal: Prove myself right.
    • Wow
    Reactions: totally_screwed
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    Sorry, I changed my mind. I will do one, but I decided to fix myself up first.
    I'm still unauthentic and I want to prevent myself from procrastinating.
    I'll be doing a minimalist approach for a few weeks, so I'll see you later or from time to time.
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    Goals: NO MUSIC, NO GAMES, NO FUN, NO LEAVING THE TEXTBOOK, NOTHING BUT EXAMS.
    (Exercise only at 5 PM - 10 minutes and intense)
    Reward: Come back to socializing with a new mind.
    I've been ignoring my goals for too long, time to ignore any pressures.
    Bye everyone, see you all in the holidays in moderation.
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    Dude the lecture notes are much more important than the textbooks
    My status: Potential Trillion-Air
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    It’s actually scary how much has changed since the me who didn’t know how to spell “trillionaire” correctly.
    I feel worlds apart from that mentally-broken, heartbroken self.
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    And that previous me who said the comment directly above, didn’t even know the least of just what he was getting into.
    But, now you’re more normal and less ordinary than at any point during these 5 years.
    You’re not as normal nor eccentric as you were when you were 14, but you’re closer than ever.
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    And then that me above...
    Holy crap so much has changed.
    Everything is going to change, for everyone.
    It's like I've seen everything before, and I'm playing a totally different game to what everyone else currently believes to be part of the main story, but in reality, it isn't even the prologue.
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