Tips for my given feedback - Expression (1 Viewer)

[clouderity]

Hey all! End of year is around the corner so I am exiceted
Anyways I was wondering, considering that i am going into stage 6 this yr I really want to keep improving on my english performance (Im doing advanced english), so the other day i asked my englishh teacher on sum general feedback and here is what she said:

Essay/extended response -
- When I write, my 'expression' is significantly letting me down and I need to work on the way I write.
- She suggests for me to simplify my sentences a bit more and use words if I know the context to them
- She also suggests I practice using sentence structures

Do you guys have any thoughts about this feedback? I will take this very seriously + it would be great if you guys gave me some tips on how to improve my writing expression to make it sound formal, clear and consise... Thanks!

 

[f7eeting]

Hey all! End of year is around the corner so I am exiceted
Anyways I was wondering, considering that i am going into stage 6 this yr I really want to keep improving on my english performance (Im doing advanced english), so the other day i asked my englishh teacher on sum general feedback and here is what she said:

Essay/extended response -
- When I write, my 'expression' is significantly letting me down and I need to work on the way I write.
- She suggests for me to simplify my sentences a bit more and use words if I know the context to them
- She also suggests I practice using sentence structures

Do you guys have any thoughts about this feedback? I will take this very seriously + it would be great if you guys gave me some tips on how to improve my writing expression to make it sound formal, clear and consise... Thanks!

I struggled a lot with this too What I'd do is every time I'd write something, I'd go over it and cross out any sentences that were excessive or just unclear. If you do this enough, you may notice a few problems with how you structure your responses. For example, maybe not having a clear thesis, or having a distinct, well defined argument etc.
After I noticed the mistakes I kept making it really just took lots of practice to improve.
I'd also HIGHLY recommend to do this in timed conditions because usually time pressure is what causes you to lose clarity so you need to make it nearly instinct to structure a response well without stalling too much.

Also, your teacher is right- structure is key. Some exemplar essays seem really wordy and complex but they can all be boiled down to a relatively similar structure. That being, thesis, evidence, explanation/technique (order is generally interchangeable for these 2) and rinse and repeat 3 times for each paragraph (along with a general thesis for each body paragraph). I kind of visualise it like a tree branching off starting from one main idea which can be split into a bunch of mini ones, kind of like a fractal lol
Whilst you could structure your essays however you want, if you're like me and struggle with being concise following a generic structure and sticking to it really does help a lot.

Then, from there, it all hinges on the strength of your arguments and vocabulary, which is funnily enough the easier part to get down. This is because in exams, at least for me, I'd just regurgitate a bunch of ideas and spam fancy vocabulary without properly answering the question or structuring it in a clear manner which caused me to lose wayyy too many marks

Hope this helps! Good luck with stage 6!

 

[clouderity]

WOWWW f7eeting thank you so much !! I really appreciate ur response it was rlly insigtful, i'll be using your tips! Btw gl for the hsc next yr!!